OK, so it's been a while since I've posted anything to my blog since I've been pretty crazy busy with life. I'm gonna be catching up, posting & publishing a bunch of drafts that I'll be polishing up for all you readers out there who might be remotely interested in these thoughts I'm sharing.
This first post (since my last post many weeks ago) was inspired by another blog entry I ran across:
Treat Me To A Feast: Notes from My Abundant Life: Not a dream deferred, just one long in coming...: For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it ...
I've really felt God had it in mind for me at the exact time I ran into it. I woke up with a deep desire & need to do some more soul-searching. I have been seeking God for what it is He wants for me. I have dreams to do something amazing & great but I've been praying for wisdom as well in the mean time. It "kills" me though because wisdom generally means stepping back, taking a look, & seeing the foolishness of the actions that could be taken & so choose not to follow that path because it might lead to some consequences that I'd rather not experience. I'm not one who would actually be so cautious and so in the past, I've been less concerned about making mistakes. But I realize that the failures & mistakes have so many more implications on not only me but also my family. I wonder about whether I should throw caution to the wind & if God would allow me more favor than I could ever imagine. Or do I need to be more cautious & wise because I do have a family to take care of. Lately, I've found myself verbalizing that I don't worry about the steps of faith I've been planning to make because based on my own experience, when God calls you to something - He always gives you the grace to handle what comes your way.
Recently, this faith journey of mine has brought me into some really uncomfortable places in life where I would never imagine I'd ever be. I have a dream of being very prosperous. And when I say very, I mean extremely prosperous. But in the process of getting there & in terms of our finances, standards, & convictions, I'm way out of my comfort zone. I loved being in control of my finances before I ever had children. Not only my own finances, but the finances of my hubby. Once I had my children though, I lost all sense of what I would call reasonableness. I've always wanted to give my children whatever they ask for - just like my own mom did when I was growing up, but my better sense & mentorship from so many around me has allowed me to teach my own kids some lessons in the mean time. If they want something, I'll usually ask if they have any money to get it. Thankfully they don't complain a whole lot if they don't. They basically just deal with it if they don't have the funds or they wait until they can either make some money or get some money from the gracious family & friends that choose to share with them. Just recently, I've decided that as soon as Mario & I can, I want to start giving them a regular allowance. I never got an allowance growing up, but I see the value of it now. Also, I've found myself telling my kids that they should find a way to make some extra money & not let a temporary lack drive them away from trying to get what they want. A little initiative & some brainstorming & I'm sure they could do something to get the needed funds for their needs & even some wants.
In terms of standards & convictions, I haven't in the past really put things down in writing. But given the fact that I'm looking to build a business of my own, there are many values or standards that I want to be sure I've got in writing so I can look back & determine whether I'm out of line with what I believe needs to be a guiding conviction.
Love you all because I know I'm loved with the awesome love of God & so I just gotta share it.
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